What the HELL happened to...HALLOWEEN

What The Hell Happened to HALLOWEEN

Don Roberts

So onward and upward we go. Having survived Jason and his crucifixion at the hands of the studio that bought him, aided in part to the cult that is the MPAA, we move on to the next franchise. One that had a journey you’d feel was eerily similar if not spot on. But managed to keep itself as its protagonist, relatively clean from the trappings of other franchises, and zombification.

Seriously it’s always gotten me how Mikey never once seemed to join the zombie stomp with Jason and others. You could attribute that to his being ‘the shape’ and just always there, never dying. But he does die. He just stays blessed with never showing death ageing or slowing him down.

Until we get into the remake trilogy.

Which for good, and obvious reasons. We will not be getting into.

I also covered those films and I still hold today, no change what so ever in opinion that those films should only ever have existed as a stand alone single film, and not the laughing stock it became. The only comfort I get from that film is that it landed the director coined to ‘save horror franchises’ his role in resurrecting the Exorcist series. Only to have it laughably fail and kill off his stint in horror.

But as always, I digress.

What we have here is a mixed bag that Jason himself would have enjoyed, more so than what he got and we were given. There were some legitimate attempts made with Halloween. There was a good attempt at their own Tommy Jarvis type arch. But it still ended up fumbling the ball in ways that really made you have to ask, what the hell happened? Especially given the attempted restart of things with the franchise after 3.

I know it’s popular now to love part 3 and see it as being something corny and to, in the horror community cheer for. At its core the idea was interesting, It adapted the early idea the other franchises would mirror in their own morbid ways as well. Season of the Witch gave us Halloween without Michael Myers, much in the same vein that Friday the 13th part 5 gave is a Friday without Jason, and Wes Craven saying hold my beer by making A New Nightmare years later giving is a Nightmare without Freddy. All of these hit people in a similar fashion, wondering where the character was they came to see, but each offering a unique idea. Of these three franchises I would say Nightmare managed the attempted change better. As was pointed out during what I would kindly call my disastrous attempt at having A New Nightmare thrown to film hell on Reels of Justice, The film itself wasn’t even called A Nightmare on Elm Street, it was A new Nightmare. So having a demon that idolized the character in the film Freddy Kreuger worked as a new film. I still believe that movie is horrible and history will I feel agree with me. But I did do a shit job on that episode.

But here with Halloween it did not go over well. In all honesty if Carpenter sold the idea differently, it might’ve worked and not ended up on its release and still for a vocal majority a failure in the franchise. But could have served as what Carpenter thought to be a more interesting idea. Carpenter didn’t want to do more Halloween movies with Laurie and Michael. He was done after the first, but the studio wanted their sequel. So be agreed and ended it in a way he felt would surely keep them from bringing Michael or anyone back.

By blinding him and blowing him up with Loomis in a hospital.

He felt it was more interesting if Halloween was less about Michael, and more about other terrors. Michael was simply a cog in the machine of an ever terrifying concept that could haunt and stalk and terrorize other towns and people. But studios wanted to market Mikey and Halloween, and the fans wanted to see him stalking around stabbing with silent abandon. So the idea didn’t land and instead we would have to wait years before the series would get its revival and a return to form. Doing so in a big way that would reassure fans Michael was back, the Irish were not trying to kill you, and Halloween was going to always BE Halloween.

And yet it still went down hill. Just with a few stumbles along the way. Unlike Jason who just walked into a field of rakes over, and over, and over. Never moving forward or back. Just stumbling aimlessly one way to the next.

Is Halloween 4 a bad film? Not especially, no. So why cover it and not its sequel? Because like with Jason, Michaels story officially did end with part 2, until his resurrection. Same as Jason at the end of part 6. After Halloween 2 what we got was, definitely something. A very wholly different something with good and bad elements which resulted in a failed trilogy of films telling a new story, and dragging us into films that just progressively got worse, and worse as they went on. So we will appreciate what we can, before submerging ourselves into the raw sewage that awaits.

I really don’t find Halloween The Return of Michael Myers to be horrible or worthy of seeing destroyed. I find its interesting and a great opening contrast to poor Jason. That being said, lets get into it already!

Halloween 4 The Return of Michael Myers

For once a film that delivers on its title. It’s both the return of Michael to the franchise the birthed him and a return to horror(of sorts) in a lot of ways. Despite the efforts of the man many dump responsibility on for having dragged and killed this franchise, Moustafa Akkad.

While at the same time

Fans were happy with the man for keeping the franchise alive and going.

It’s a complicated relationship and this film was the one time fans could be happy and accept the palate cleansing they were given after Carpenter’s vision for part 3.

People weren’t sure what to expect with the announcement and release of this film, in large part because Carpenter wanted nothing to do with it. According to Carpenter and again part of the fan base. Michaels story ended with part 2. He and Debrah Hill really didn’t even want to do the sequel but they did. When that did well Akkad, who had been producing the films thus far, has put a lot of pressure on Carpenter and Hill to do a 3rd film…then a 4th film. After a lot of back and forth the duo came up with a story for the return of Michael. The story was-much like part 3 very different and typical of Carpenter. I say that because if you are familiar with his body of work past the flash ship films, Carpenter really likes to dip his toes into some far out concepts and expand past traditional horror. Prince of Darkness, In the Mouth of Madness stand out as big toe dips into that pool, which wasn’t for everyone. Sure. But they made for very interesting and fun trips. His take on Halloween 4 was no different.

The Story

His take on Michaels return was more of a psychological approach. The film would take place roughly 5-10 years after the events of Halloween 2. The town of Haddonfield would adapt a Footloose like policy of banning or removing the celebration of Halloween from their town. The town had become consumed with the dark blood stain that Myers left on them from the night he came home and slaughtered everyone in his path. Something Crystal Lake could’ve benefited from past a rebrand. The main characters in this story would be the teen-twenties something Tommy Doyle and Lindsey Wallace, the two children Laurie saved at the end of the first film. The movie would have followed those two, dealing with their traumatic PTSD from that night, living in a town that sees them as constant reminders of Michael and what he did. Ultimately all we know past this is that the towns immense fear and attempted repression of Halloween would end up summoning Michael back to life and to the town.

Honestly that itself would have proven a worthwhile watch. Carpenter is(I feel) at his best when doing ghost stories and leaning more into the psychological. It would have been interesting seeing what became of and what he’d do ultimately with the two last surviving characters of the original films. Also the large absence of Dr Loomis from the future films. Carpenter stuck with his two first films and kept Loomis dead in his story for the fourth film. Given how many of these Donald did as Loomis. Maybe that would have been for the better. As much as I love the man he really did have a similar journey of suffering that Doug Bradly as well endured through the Hellraiser franchise. Which. We will get into. Down the road.

So Akkad rejected this story. He didn’t want Michael to be supernatural. Which is odd given he already WAS with his anti bullets in body policy and walking out of an exploding Hospital. Moustafa wanted to go back to form. Slash and gash. Carpenter and Hill by that point had thrown their hands up. John wanted to move on with his life and he did not want to get tied further down into a franchise he never wanted in the first place. So he sold the franchise to Moustafa and walked away better for it. With the franchise in his hands now, Akkad could do what he wanted. The film we ended up with did not mirror the concept given by Carpenter. Instead of a town living in fear of celebrating a holiday, we have a town that has moved on from Myers. Gone are Lindsey and Tommy, replaced now by of all things. Laurie Strode’s daughter, Jamie Lloyd. Good for Laurie moving on with her life, meeting a good man and having a kid.

Except she’s dead.

Laurie is killed off screen which keeps from having to answer why Jamie Lee isn’t in this film and further moves us away from the first two films. So Jamie is adopted and living it up with a new older sister. The two are living their best life, a moody teen and her annoying adopted sister. Until Michael enters the picture. The film still takes place 10 years roughly after the events of part 2. Michael since the explosion has been unresponsive in a coma. Mirroring the events of the original film he ends up waking up and choosing violence during a transfer. Which draws the now heavily scarred Dr. Loomis back into the story. He’s Michaels forever stalker and biggest detractor against prisoner reformation.

Ultimately Michael makes it back to the town he made infamous, begins doing what he does best. But. Looking for family and killing new friends along the way. Eventually leading us to the climax of the film where Jamie and her older sister end up having to hide out at the Sheriff’s house. The most awkward and fun lockup, as the sheriff’s daughter is the same person who stole away Rachel’s(Jamies sister) boyfriend. I mean granted if a hyper unkillable man is stalking you and your adopted sister, being in the sheriff’s home is a good safe choice in theory and you are still going to be on edge. But having to stay in his house with his daughter whom still smells like your boyfriends dick, sipping coffee by the fireplace still carrying skid marks from being laid out and railed in front of it. Well that’s going to make things a bit awkward. Thankfully they don’t need to linger too much on this or compare notes, as Michael fights his way into the house, battling it out like a high level character mining xp in the spawning house. The girls narrowly escape and amp up the movies climax with a car chase and an angry mob. I don’t say this a lot, but we really need more angry mobs in movies. They always do horribly, they do as much if not more damage than the killer. They end up slaughtered in mass, and if they do survive, despite their fuckups they end up over doing it killing the bad guy and feel justified by the end.

Seriously it’s a fun side story in this movie. The town is tired of Michael and his bullshit, they aren’t going to have any repeats of things from 10 years ago. So they grab their guns and group up in their trucks. The group actually thinks they found Michael and decide on the shoot first drink after approach. Ending up killing an innocent kid. Instead of turning themselves in and arrest being made. The group save the girls, driving off to who knows where with the girls in tow. It leads to a great scene of Michael killing them off, until Rachel decides to do what she does best and shatters Michaels hips. Just with a truck this time. But Michael isn’t dead. He’s only mostly dead. Enter the mob. Who mow down Michael in the same joyful style of The Predator. These guys aren’t just unloading their guns and nuts. These guys are passing out ammo like candy, reloading and going for broke on his ass.

Michael is down and the movie ends with a great cliffhanger. It’s worth going into because god I loved seeing this in theaters. Still do today in 4k. When Michael drops, Jamie goes over to her estranged uncle and touches his hand. He’s mowed down and falls dead into a mineshaft. The girls are brought home and Jamies adopted mom fixes her a bath. From there Dr Loomis is finally able to relax and unclench his likely burned butthole for the first time in ten years. Until we hear a scream from upstairs and Loomis, expecting Michael to have returned rushes the staircase. Only for him and all of us to find Jamie, dressed as a clown much like Michael was in the first film after killing his sister. Holding a bloodied knife herself. Breathing heavily staring off blankly. She’d killed her adopted mother and Loomis breaks entirely. Having seen the cycle begin again.

You need to see this movie. The story really is a good return to form and the film delivers on everything that made the last real Halloween, part two memorable. Michaels Brutality and a good twist ending that promised an interesting future for the franchise. The film took notes from Friday the 13th part 5 and kicked it up a notch with a child becoming the new killer.

All around and undeniably this movie was a success. Everything that Friday the 13th The New Blood wanted to be and wasn’t. These two mirrored each other in a good deal of ways. Only one pulled off in the end what both hoped to achieve. Both films had similar budgets and financial success. The Return of Michael Myers was made for around 5 million and grossed well over 18 million, same as The New Blood, only this movie carried positive word of mouth.

Both had vastly  different story concepts that ended up rushed to get filmed. It isn’t entirely unheard of for films to do that. Only this film wasn’t pinned in 93 hours like Jason had to go through. This movie famously had a huge deadline to beat before a writers strike was going to take place. They had 11 days to work out a filmable script and they managed right down to the ticking clock. This forced the writers to make a script they new would be a one and done deal. No rewrites no feedback. Nothing. Like a lot of shot on film direct to video releases, what you wrote is what you got.

So it survived word of mouth, it made it through the writers room without rewrites and revisions. So what about the studio? Jason faced a lot of interference on that front with The New Blood up through his finale in part 10. This shockingly did not. Because no major studio was involved. Moustafa produced it and financed the film through his own film company. Hence the film survived any crucial pushback and studio head feedback. Another axe dodged by Michael.

But he still had to face a boss fight, the same one that killed Jason. The MPAA.

Just like The New Blood, this film was going to meet the scalpel of the MPAA and its war on horror. They made several cuts to the film but still came out ahead in the gore department. How did Jason get so heavily cut to the point of coming off like Jason Light, while Myers ended up coming out ahead with more visceral attitude in his kills?

Even with what we got there was a lot, a lot removed. They cut out decapitations, throat ripping’s. Shotgun impaling with guts pouring out. The film had violence and gore, it had horror. But it overloaded, absolutely. Jason did similar too, sure. But Halloween managed to make smarter cuts that while it removed excessive gore that upset the MPAA, it managed to keep intact enough to hold onto the kills and make them effective. Jason didn’t get that. Not because the people didn’t know what they were doing, but because it was one of the bigger examples made by the MPAA. To add fuel to this warm fire, it also highlights a stark difference between these two horror icons. Jason before and after zombification always had super human like kills. He’s like a Jackie Chan murderer. The man turned a plastic party horn into a weapon for fucks sake. He folded a body in half, and he twisted a head completely around. Michael’s kills were a bit more grounded. Even if he himself was more supernatural in form. His kills were less fantastical. Somehow. Did that mean they could get away with more? No absolutely not. This is where the interesting part comes in. And also the fucked up part.

Keep in mind that these two films? Came out at the same time.

The New Blood went through 9 rounds with the MPAA. Each visit was given the threat of an X rating until more, and more cuts would be made.

The studio new this would happen, so they made a lot of changes themselves to preemptively strike the film.

The New Blood, believe it or not was deemed and called ‘too sadistic’, it was cruel and celebrated its violent nature. So it faced the blunt hand of the group.

Two franchises with unstoppable killing machines famous for their kills. Only one cut down as brutally as he cut down his own victims. So…

What happened?

Supreme bias in the war against horror.

Like in all wars. You declare death to all under one flag. All are equal to the flame. Until they aren’t. Exceptions are made in war, surrenders are accepted and some. Some are deemed acceptable even if the rest can be destroyed. Halloween was the exception.

See Halloween was seen as being more classy. It wasn’t mindless violence for the sake of, it wasn’t horror in its essence. It was criminal and clinical. Jason killed for the love of the game. Jason also had multiple sequels while Halloween had reached its 4th film. Given the films before this one? The franchise never went off like Jason did. It didn’t have a long history of nudity and excessive violence. It had two films, a third with cyborgs and snake mask.

Friday the 13th was a large thorn in the side of the MPAA, religious groups and everyone looking to tare down the horror genre. Michael was the silent shape that didn’t stand out in the same light. So he got a pass. An example of this, by no means one to take to the bank but its one I like drawing from in my experience. Like I’ve said before I grew up loving horror films as a kid. My dad hated horror. He couldn’t stand blood and guts of any kind. My mom would usually take me to see these films or watch them at home. She admitted to me she saw The Exorcist in theaters, confirmed what my dad and the news said that people were screaming, fainting, vomiting in the theater, claiming the film possessed them. My mom went with her friends to see it and she got in trouble. Because she was laughing her ass off during the movie.

My mom had to watch all the greats with me. Freddy, Jason, Michael, Leatherface. And she told me Michael was her favorite.

Freddy was funny to her, Jason was cheesy, Leatherface was boring. But Michael she liked. Because she’d taken criminal courses in college. She was a guard in the California state women’s prison and her claim to fame in our family was getting to watch over one of the Manson girls, who gifted my mom two paintings for her to give as gifts to her two kids she told my mom she was going to have. And me and my sister have now. She liked Michael Myers because he was more grounded to her. He felt like an actual serial killer, his movies(overall) were less silly and more realistic to her. They didn’t get insane like Jason did with the zombiness and excessive blood and nudity.

Hollywood and the MPAA shared this view. So because of this it got a literal pass. “You may be horror and we despise horror. But you are a different class of horror”, that’s legitimately what it came down too. Michael could get away with more. And so he did.

As was typical of Myers, he took his shots, the cuts from the MPAA and got up, stalking off.

What about the director and producers? What happened with them? Did they clash, was there differences of opinions that shifted things and could’ve derailed things?

Yes, and no. The two did have different visions, yes. But they compromised. They worked together unlike Paramount and their director. Dwight Little directed this film and he had a different vision for it, same as Carpenter. Akkad had a different vision as well and fought to keep what he wanted.

Carpenter wanted to go psychological and supernatural. Dwight was no different. He wanted to do a crime film. He wanted something like Manhunter. Silence of the Lambs. A procedural crime film where Loomis would track Myers like a real FBI agent. Michael would be more clinical in his kills, stalking his way to Jamie. He was gearing more for a crime/action film. Much like what was later pitched for Jason Takes Manhattan. Akkad wanted to stick with what he felt Michael was and should remain. A slasher.

The two fought back and fourth but as I said they ended up with a compromise. Dwight got to have Dr. Loomis stalking Michael and working with the police. He got to make more speeches about evil and do his thing. Michael made kills with purpose and worked his way to Jamie. Funnily enough though, When the film was done, and the MPAA made their cuts? Akkad and his film company felt the final product was tame. It needed more violence. Even after the cuts made, taking out excessive gore. The director felt it still wasn’t good enough and needed more.

Now. Hold on to your butts. I mean it, grab those glutes because you aren’t ready for this fun. Moustafa decided the film was too tame, he studio agreed. This meant reshoots. They hired an effects artist and director for these second-unit reshoots.

The man they hired? John Carl Buechlar. Who came fresh off of his last film, Friday the 13th The New Blood.

The same man, who’s work was shredded to bits by the MPAA. Was brought in to make The Return of Michael Myers bloodier.

Seriously.

John reshot the movie to bring gore back into the movie, after having all of his cut in his last movie. The thoughts going through that dudes head…man. He managed to reshoot key deaths from the film in such a way that the editing got the ‘point’ across, gave us the gore that was missing. While keeping it well within the MPAA standard for an R rating and not going overboard. They took what was learned with Jason and his 9 round slaughter session, and managed in one round with the MPAA to keep their R rating. It’s insane! Literally having your work shredded to bits, only to be called back to DO the very thing you got scorned for earlier. Strange days man. But he did it. He actually did it.

And it worked.

The movie ultimately proved a success, financially and with fans. Jason was cut down and Michael survived with a great twist ending, a good return to form, and a bright potential for further sequels down the road.

People are starting to rediscover this film and they really should. It marked a proper return to form that most franchises end up fumbling somehow. Even Freddy had his issues and he stayed with the franchise without getting a break unlike Jason. This film does have its hate though. You have as I mentioned at the start, fans who rejected it because it was done without the blessing of Carpenter. It also had people hating it for its twist. Not the ending twist. But the idea that Michael was Jamies uncle. People mistake this film as being the one to introduce the idea that Laurie was Michaels long lost sister and thus he had to kill Jamie because of her being family. But truth is this film is blameless for this. That little twist of family drama is entirely from Carpenter believe it or not. While writing Halloween 2, Carpenter said he and Hill struggled back and fourth with trying to explain events from the first film. He couldn’t justify why Michael was so intent on going after Laurie Strode. Again had this franchise been done today it’d be, likely easier to come up with. But back when these films weren’t franchises. When that just wasn’t a thing and sequels were still a novel thing. You didn’t have to flesh out your ideas while considering a broader universe for them. Carpenter jokingly admitted he got really. Really drunk and decided Laurie was Michael’s long lost sister, her last name was changed to hide her identity. Carpenter coined it and this film during its opening with Michael waking from his coma, overhears the paramedics talking about Laurie’s death and having a daughter whom was put up for adoption and name changed. Setting Michael off and on his merry killing spree.  The whole long lost sister subplot stuck for many sequels, ultimately being retconned by the time we get to the reboot Halloween trilogy. Honestly it wasn’t that bad a thing, until later in the series. For now? It was motive and it worked.

Everything worked for this film and despite its challenges. It brought Michael back. There was no way this wasn’t getting a follow up. Everyone wanted more, especially with that ending.

That’s when the trouble began, Great amazing, hilarious trouble. For something to have gone so right and been handed off so well. No one knew, or thought it could go so wrong.

But oh lordy did it.

Part 5 The Revenge of Michael Myers

With great success comes holy shit what the fuck happened failure.

In most cases, like this!

So let’s get right into it because like my ex told her friends, this isn’t something you wanna sit on and linger. With success fresh in their heads and Loony Toons like dollar signs popping from the producer and studios eyes, of course that meant sequel time. That meant getting a writer, making a good script and continuing the good faith you established with the last film.

At least that’s how it works in theory, and normally. In most cases. In this case? They didn’t even wait a year. Akkad rushed this thing full force. No questions asked, no lets consider this or that. Man saw money and wanted to rush out a film so fast that even Golan and Globus would feel humbled.

Lets get the story out of the way, the less time we spend on this film the better. It really is that bad.

Story

So the film takes place roughly 5 years after the events of the last film. But not before we get a retcon of the last films famous twist ending. Instead of playing back Jamies kill, we get to play count the bullets with Michael as he’s shot down by the local mob and falls down into an old mineshaft. Eventually leading him on a baby moses journey down the river until he is saved by Captain Crabby Patty and his parrot friend. Michael is nursed back to health only to reenact the famous joke about the man who found a frozen rattlesnake, took him inside his home and thawed him out only to get bitten.

Meanwhile Jamie is in an institution and we learn she has been reduced to a mute in this film. Now even though they have dropped the twist ending. They are keeping the fact Jamie touched her evil uncle’s hand. Because the movie they wanted to keep from being supernatural was successfully kept free of being supernatural. They decided to make it supernatural and create a psychic link between Jamie and Michael. Jamie in this is suffering seizures seemingly out of nowhere. But Loomis knows better and we soon do too as we learn she is seeing the new batch of murders through her uncles eyes.

Not settling for taking away the twist ending from fans, they decide to go a step further. Not only is Jamie back but so is her trusted protector and big sister Rachel. At least she is until Michael brutally kills her in the middle of the day. Don’t worry about it, we can now shift focus over to her Rachel’s bestest friend Tina. This is another connective tissue with these franchises. A Nightmare on Elm Street had a Tina, Friday the 13th had a Tina. Tina can’t escape the horror apparently.

Dr. Loomis has abandoned his sanity and decided it’s time to go off the books. He is using Jamie as walking bait and away to track Michael to get at the source and end the madness again for good. Again.

Yes Loomis actually uses Jamie as bait in this film. The man is not the same as he has been. Even though Jaimie did not become the new killer, we still kept her having ‘attacked’ her adopted mother. But they retconned her death and now the mom survived. Don’t worry about it guy.

So even though Jamie attempted to murder her stepmom, It was enough for Loomis who survived a hospital explosion, and survived Michael, to snap and decide all lives are expendable when it comes to dealing with Michael and ending him. So after a few deaths, some odd clown music accompanying police officers. We get Michael, Jamie, and Loomis inside the old Myers house. Which has been remodeled from its simple normal two story home from the original. Into a decrepit Victorian mansion. Seriously this house is like the Adams Family with less class and love. Don’t worry about it. We’re rushing to the best parts here. Even better than the questionable cops of comedy.

Jamie, being the live bait and chased around the house, ends up in a room filled with candles, a baby sized coffin and I’m pretty sure a pipe organ for Michael to play somewhere. I mention this scene because Jamie lays down in the coffin and when found by her uncle. She decides to try reasoning with his humanity. She touches his hand again, and pleads with him to be nice, stop killing, stop hurting people and maybe they’ll be cooler toward him. Instead of constantly trying to kill him. Michael uncharacteristically removes his mask, and cries a single manly tear for his niece. Only to fly into a fit of rage at the thought of living a live without his best friend Stabby McStabface knifey. So he works out his emotional differences by stabbing everything within stabbing distance until he has to chase down Jaimie again. Leading him to the one and only thing that no one is safe from, as we learned from the film Kung Pow Enter the Fist.

A chain net.

Loomis, who lost his damn fool mind. Used Jamie to bring her to Michaels Victorian home, set up a large chain net like a Wiley Coyote skit, Drops it on Michael, shoots him with tranquilizer darts. Which work too slowly, so he begins beating the shit out of Michael with a 4x4 until finally Michael goes to sleep, or another concussion. Loomis, who had been trying to kill Myers since part 2, and part 4 and most of this film. Decided the best we can hope for, and he can do, is knock him out and let the courts handle him. Which is how he’s managed to escape every time so far. But maybe the next time will be different.

Now for the films twist ending. Because Akkad learned people LOVED the twist in the last film. So you need ANOTHER twist! The twist in this story was handled by the mysterious man in black. A figure that appeared at different points in the film. Showing up one more time, at the police station holding Michael. Which ends the film with our survivors going to the Police Station, finding it absolutely destroyed. Bodies everywhere and Michael, along with the man in black gone. Roll those credits baby!

One of the more difficult challenges writing these has been summarizing the films I normally would spend at least 10 pages going over the story of. Doing a summary of a film who’s story makes no fucking sense and has insane choices littered through out its entire run time is even harder.

I can’t stress enough what a joke this movie was. In a literal and figurative way too. It really is worth mentioning the police duo. Like before with the Jason films, the music was changed to be safe and non offensive or something that will recruit kids to the devil. It’s fine for what it is. Iconic as Carpenter’s music is, and was. But what stands out in this film is one of its biggest gripes from fans and what the fuck am I watching moments.

Which leads us into the discussion and fun of just what the hell happened here.

Everything that could go wrong, literally did go wrong. In every conceivable way and even where the last one succeeded, this one managed to fall victim.

To start, we have the story changes.

Originally the film was ready to commit with Jamie being the killer. The working title The Killer Inside me, would follow Jamie, fully evil, and killing. Under the guidance of her uncle who was still very alive. Dr. Loomis would be trying to kill Michael and stop Jamie. Either getting her help or ultimately having to deal with her the only way Michael could be similarly dealt with. Ending once and for all the Myers bloodline of murderers. The script had Dr. Loomis ultimately being killed by Michael and the series would safely continue on its marry way.

Akkad and the studio decided no fucking chance. Firstly for reasons that made sense. Audiences may not be sold on a movie following a child going on a mass murder spree. So that was a good reason to retcon it. But the main reason? Shifting to Jamie as the killer would take focus off Michael, and without Michael you cant sell a franchise. No merchandise and no future. So killer Jamie was shelved and Michael was restored to central killer status.

That was as far as the story concept went, and the script.

Akkad rushed this thing out the doors onto the race track. After tossing the killer kid concept it was back to basics. A director was named, and the man started filming like a Marvel movie. Without a completed script.

The film was being shot on the fly and this lead to miscommunication, troubles while filming and a director having no clue what the fuck to do. Which lead to the great plot twist of the movie this time around.

Michael in this movie was scene with a rune tattoo on his wrist. Which was tied into the mysterious man in black the movie introduced to us as well. Giving us the idea that Michael had protectors and was part of a much larger darker group. A cult of followers. But not really.

The writers did not craft this. Akkad did not introduce the idea as a good twist. The director did. He started a trend with this movie that got continued. He admitted the rune tattoo, the man in black, the idea of a cult protecting Myers? He did this out of boredom. Not having a script to shoot from, and no idea where the movie was going. He decided he could just film the stuntman walking around in a trench coat, Being weird and mysterious, and the writers could figure out what to do with it. He was bored and wanted to add atmosphere, he wanted to give mystery. The writers didn’t do anything with it. It’s just there, without explanation. Out of boredom this man created what would later be called, The Cult of Thorn.

But it wasn’t the only time something was put in the movie as a bored joke. That next step in the films fall goes to of all people. The composer, who I genuinely enjoy soundtracks from, Alan Howarth. Alan said the production was chaotic and nothing made sense. He decided as a joke, to give a laugh and some levity. He added a sill score to every scene with two cops. He stopped composing and used slide whistles. Clown hammer bonks, spring boing effects from cartoons and silly music. He thought it’s make them laugh.

They used it as a finished soundtrack.

It wasn’t the director being cheeky or French and deciding it was great and worked in the film. No one cared and it went in the final film.

Granted though, the director did make the two police men the dumbest duo of bumbling idiots. He was doing it as homage to Wes Craven and his first film. The problem was, he was having two cops talk like they were in an Ed Wood film and the comedy didn’t land. For anyone. Living or dead.

So couple two cops talking like they’re in a 50’s tv show, paired with cartoonish clown music and you have the creation of a lasting still cringe addition to the film.

We have a rushed production

No script

A bored director and a composer making accidental music no one removed.

All this before we get to the MPAA.

Halloween 4 got a light talking too previously, and because it was considered high brow horror it made it through. Coupled with smart editing after reshoots the movie passed inspection. Not this time. Not what so ever.

This film wasn’t just edited, it was eviscerated. No gore passed inspection this time, and no reshoots would be performed either. This had to be rushed out so, no time obviously. Gotta keep things going. Of the cuts made to the film, two stood out for very different reasons.

One stood justified by the MPAA as being too graphic, realistic, and incredibly brutal. It was the scene involving what happened at the police station when Michael was broken out. We actually got to see everything playout. This was going to be a sort of magnum opus, the big holy shit moment of violence in the film. There was no way in hell they’d let it pass, and they didn’t.

Oddest of cut scenes though, was the original resurrection of Michael. This opening is where the rune tattoo seen on Michael and later the man in black came from. Originally Michaels body is found by a large occultist, named Dr Death. He performs a black magic ritual comparable to Billy Witch Doctor Dot Com. After chanting arise chicken, chicken arise. Michael is reborn and immediately brutally kills the man. The rune tattoo on his wrist was part of the ritual and explains his new found strength later on.

The movie REALLY did reverse its decision on keeping itself grounded and away from the supernatural that killed Jason and brought him back. It’d be funny if it wasn’t so confusingly sad.

The problems don’t stop there, oh no. No, no.

It has to be said that part 4 really, well and truly was a loved and enjoyed sequel. Not just to fans of the original but even new fans. People loved Jamie. They loved her protective sister and they wanted to see them come together, save Jamie from turning into a killer. They wanted to know what would happen next. So killing off Rachel so brutally in the first 15-20 minutes of the movie did not sit well.  People really hated them for that, which given past horror films says a lot. I mean Dream Warriors brought back Nancy and her father. But her death(and his) satisfied fans of the original and people accepted it. People were far less accepting and happy of this, more so because it was they felt, needless. I wouldn’t think myself that it was worth hating the film for. It makes Michael feel like my mom said, real. But alas people really did not want to forgive the film for killing a character they really loved.

On top of all this you did have fights of plenty on set. I mean without a script it’s going to happen. Only this time around it was Donald Pleasence fighting. Vocally losing his shit with the producers, the director. Everyone. He, like the fans. Were not at all happy with how they wrote Dr. Loomis. He did NOT like him using Jamie as bait. He did not like his character suddenly becoming gun happy and aggressive. Willing to do anything just to get Michael. The whole point of his character was being an anchor in reality. Trying to save people while dealing with Michael. Offering explanation and serving as the anchor of good countering Michaels evil. Instead he was written as a man on the edge not caring who he had to go through and what it cost as long as it meant ending Michael. Even if it meant shaking a kid and treating her like shit.

What else could possibly go wrong with so much already on the fire? Well, to add more fuel to this comedy of errors. There’s finally the look of Michael. His costume didn’t fit. They had the wrong masks on set. They also had unfinished mask used during filming. Including a pink haired mask which does appear in the film at some point too. But what people noticed and stood out oddly, was Michaels head looked baggy and comically oversized. That’s because it WAS.

The actor playing Michael this time out had talked about the mask being wrongly sized. He would have to get other people on set to help him even attempt putting a mask on. It was suffocating and they ended up finding the perfect fix. As this was a bullet train running on full throttle nothing could stop or slow down. Same with problems with your main killers look. They couldn’t slow down. So the fix for the mask nearly killing the actor? Cutting open the back of the mask and adding a slab of latex over the open back to close it. Not fit it to the actor. Just close it. The result is Michael looking like your best friend buying a Michael Myers costume from Spirit Halloween in the discount section. Its sadly funny but in the last movie when you had teens going around dressing up like Michael to pull a prank it made sense the mask would look off. At one point there’s another kid who tries doing the same, in yet another odd what the hell am I watching scene. His mask also sits wide open and you know it’s not Michael. It’s also just a weird scene because. Okay let’s think about this. A girl comes out running screaming bloody murder, begging two cops for help escaping a murderer. Out comes a guy looking like Michael Myers, wielding a knife at the girl. The cops pull their guns out on him. Watching the girl plead for her life and offer up a virgin friend, leading to the guy making a joke breaking his Myers silence. I repeat. During your goof, your little prank. Cops pull their fucking guns out on you, and you decide to commit to the bit for a joke? Your ass is getting shot, welcome to your special page in the year book. And no the scene did not play well. It was awkward and poorly acted. The clown cops did not help either.

If it needed to be asked, because it likely was. This film was not a raging success like the previous film. It still ended up costing about the same to make, between 5, nearly 6 million, and made 11 million back. Audiences did not accept this, word of mouth got around, critics impaled it and fans set it on fire.

Everything went wrong, but in both a classic Hollywood lesson way, and in a combination of both new and old ways.

When you rush a film like that, your going to stumble. When no one is holding a gun to the films production and you aren’t on a strict time limit to get it made, It’s going to have problems.

It was all completely avoidable. When you realize its still the same producer and his film company. The exact same forces that held control the last go around, in charge on this one again. You really have to wonder how they could lose their shit that quickly and in so. So many ways. It’s baffling. Avoidable, but baffling. Everything about this spelled disaster. Had they given this time to ferment it might have ended differently. Again it’s puzzling when you remember the film before it was written in 11 days during a deadline to get the job done in one go before the writers strike. Now you had a film you could make within a year or two and follow through with the foundation you planted. But they just rushed themselves through it for no reason. Ego and greed pushed this through and fueled the coals being tossed into the engine on this thing until it ultimately derailed.  You managed to piss off the actors and the fans. You didn’t turn a profit worthy of having rushed to make another sequel, let along any film even in comparison to Friday the 13th.

So naturally that means a sequel was on the way!

Part 6 The Curse of Michael Myers (Producer’s Cut)

You know it’s going to be good when I cant write out the example for this film that I want too. Not because it’s difficult to write. But because even though its funny, and perfect. I am pretty certain, like 90% certain they’d kill me for sharing it. They’d have to find me first, but oh well.

Instead we’ll use brain juice and say that. This film was hot garbage on top of more garbage, that then got turned into nonsensical garbage and released without notice.

Imagine being told, tonight we are going to have pizza. But not just any pizza. It’s going to be the hot spot in town you like. How does that sound? You enthusiastically agree, The getter of the pizza goes out, and returns. But without the promised pizza from Pizza Heaven. They instead come with ingredients to make their own pizza. Which you question. Greatly, and now face disappointment. They reassure they will make it even better. By going back out and getting you the desired Pizza. You question this because they just went out and got ingredients to MAKE a pizza, now they’re going to head out and spend more on the pizza they originally sold you on? An hour later they come back and present you with 2 frozen pizzas. The pitch is that, this way you can both have a whole pizza with your favorite toppings and nothing gets wasted, no pizza is cut short. It’s a whole pizza all for you! This is getting crazy, and you wonder why didn’t you just order pizza over the phone. So the pizza getter assures you they will make this right, and dinner will be De-Lish-us! So they head out once more, returning 4 hours later. You are starving, pissed off and they have a bag of Taco Bell they ordered an hour ago and brought home. They tell you they figured Pizza was a bad idea so they’ll get it next time and decided to get taco bell instead. They didn’t want to eat it at home because it’d be ruined by then so they ate there’s first then came home with yours. “At least you still get dinner”

This is, the best way to put this film. It in no way shape or form needed to exist or be made. It didn’t need to be what they pitched, what they wrote. What they then sold, and then cut apart and released. It just did not need to exist in the first place, and you should’ve just enjoyed rewatching part 4 again.

Every attempt with this story, made it worse. The cuts they made, made it worse. Tackling the story is, a challenge, given the cuts of this film and my ultimate decision to go with the version people think is still abysmal and garbage, but at least it makes more sense than the theatrical cut. If you want it too.

Story

This film takes place 6 years after Michael was rescued by the now called “Cult of Thorn” in part 5. Jamie is still alive and well. She is kept in an underground crypt, catered too by the cult. They really love her. Because Jamie has a condition called pregnancy. So being a cult, you can’t not be a cult without a baby ritual of some kind. Jamie flees this crypt thanks to the help of a cult member who was cool being in a cult but not so cool with baby rituals. So Jamie and her baby get out into the free world. She hides the lil bouncing baby boy, and Michael kills her.  Because killing Rachel off the first 15 minutes of the last film worked so well, lets do it again with Jamie. Why not.

Well don’t worry they didn’t just kill her off like that. Rude. She survives. At least long enough to tell a familiar face about her hidden baby who has not at all screamed for its mother while being stuffed away somewhere dark and cold. This person she tells about the baby? Is Tommy Doyle. The same Tommy the movies were going to follow and decided against. Tommy is now a reclusive survivalist who is full hog into the hunting of Myers and this cult of thorn. Tommy heads off to collect the baby quest item and gain xp. Jamie can rest happy knowing her bouncing baby is safe. Until the fabled man in black returns and shoots her in the fucking head. See they subverted your expectations. They didn’t kill her at first to upset you, they let her live. So they could kill her again! Pure Cinema.

Tommy is now carrying a baby and being the Michael Myers stalker he is. He has introduced himself to Kara Strode. Who is not Laurie Strodes daughter. Don’t worry she didn’t have multiple hidden children, Jamie remains the only child of Laurie. Kara however is Laurie’s adopted cousin. Fair enough.

Tommy is a good guy, he assures us of this by not stalking per se Kara. So much as knowing her entire family is always in danger because of Michael and his need to kill not just the family, but their children. Of which Kara has a son. So he, not her is in danger. Tommy shows his good guy status by protecting her son, and waves the baby in Karas face to show her he is good with kids and trustworthy.

If it sounds confusing don’t worry, we have Dr. Loomis yet to get too. This would mark Donald’s last appearance as Loomis and last film before his death. The saddest part of this is the fact he felt this movie would be the best in the series, the part of this that shows a god exist in this world is that he didn’t live to see the film.

So yes Loomis is in this and teams up with Tommy to hunt down Michael. Whom shows up and begins slaughtering. It’s what he does. Only this time it’s not as random and heartfelt. Because we need story and growth we need to explain why Michael is the way he is. Michael is bound by the cult via a hex. The mark on his wrist. The cult, you’d imagine uses Michael to kill for them. But no that’s too simple. Grab your pipe and drug of choice, it will only help.

Michael is the sacrifice. Their tool. He was chosen at birth, and on the night of a ritual, he inherited a demonic presence. Which granted him supernatural strength, unnatural life and healing. He received what they called the Curse of Thorn. The curse would force the sacrifice to kill their entire bloodline. Doing this would grant the cult. Nothing you’d imagine. They don’t do it for power. They don’t do it for eternal life. Their payment. For generations of a Michael Myers appearing and wiping out bloodlines thousands of years ago, is that they will not be afflicted by plagues, starvation. Basically what would be a top concern of peasants back in the dark ages. Not so much today. We are told all this in the producers cut, not the theatrical.

We are told this, because Tommy believes that Kara’s son is chosen to become the next cursed child once Michael finishes his job. Which doesn’t make sense given that kid is part of the bloodline he’s meant to destroy but. Whatever. Fuck it who cares.

Anyway.

The cult gets the baby, they begin their ultra cool cult of personality ritual to welcome young Danny as the new Michael, and the baby as their…whatever. Binding them and continuing the demons slaughter with Danny becoming the new wearer of the mask.

Tommy is against this strongly, and if he wishes to get kara another strode to keep the family line going he has to save Danny. So he counters their ritual with one of his own.  This paralyzes Michael. Magic has stopped the unstoppable man and the group are free to go. Dr. Loomis leads them all out to safety but he shant leave this doomed asylum of horror. He has unfinished business. He has a Michael to finally kill. So he travels back, finds Michael chilling out motionless and gives his swan song speech about life being funny, and his plans for opening a bar and grill, retiring with titties in his face and beer in his hands. He removes Michaels mask before he plans to kill him, only to discover it isn’t Michael. It’s the man in black. Who was revealed to be a go nowhere character that was a friend and colleague. Does not matter, no one gives a shit. The man is seen dying, having been placed in Michaels mask and clothes by Michael. Whom is now roaming dressed as the man in black. Using the last of his cult leader strength the man in black grabs Loomis by the arm and delivers a real. Passionate. Strong mans kiss. Telling Loomis, ‘Where are you going with all that cake, when people like me are starving for a sweet snack’, actually no he just grabs his arm whispers “it’s your game now” and dies. As he dies Loomis looks in horror at his own wrist where the man grabbed him and he now finds the mark of thorn upon himself. Marking him as the new cult leader of Thorn, and the official guardian of Michael. He screams like someone waking up wondering where their bottle of shampoo is  before spotting the large opened bottle of lube and magnum condom wrapper beside them and the realization where the bottle is, and the fullness they feel. Roll credits. Rest in Peace Mr. Pleasance.

That is the story. Condensed as it is. That is the films story. It sounds like word salad how I told it. Watching the movie does not help. It makes even less sense. Be it producer’s cut or not. But not the theatrical cut. Which is only. And I do mean only, the smallest reason why this film crashed and burned. Even having to ask, what the hell happened, isn’t going to make it any better. Trust me.

But we’re still here to try and understand. Just what the fuck happened in this movie, and the series, and the multiple cuts.

Refill your glass bowl, it’s only going to help. Believe me.

 Let’s start with the crust of this shit pizza. The story for this film.

The original concept they went with for this film, after the ending of the last? The film was first pitched as Halloween 666. The film would have followed an investigative journalist digging into the story of Haddonfield, Michael and the cult. Tommy Doyle was also in this script, finally returning though he was denied that in Halloween 4. Tommy would be a computer hacker specializing in the ultra cool 90’s high tech Virtual Reality. Which he uses to decode and research Celtic astrology, runes and magic. Michael Myers of course would return. But much differently. Given he was let go in the last film you’d think the cult would take care of him having freed him. No. Instead Michael is living as a maskless vagrant on the streets. Michael has adopted to living a life where no one knows what he did, who he was, and living his best life. Until he learns there is of course another Strode left in this world. The daughter of Laurie, Ja-Dana Childress.

Yeah.

The script was going to introduce this new woman as the lost daughter of Laurie. Apparently Laurie got around and famously reacted like a scared dog when giving birth. Squeezing out babies and running off leaving them behind covered in afterbirth.

Tommy the hacker, would use VR to decipher runes as well as track the cult and their antics as well as Michael. Sounds like a great plan.

Wisely. Akkad decided to scrap that idea. He had a moment of clarity deciding that, audiences may not like having another daughter of Laurie’s, when Jamie was already that. Which reminded him that Jamie was still alive in the last film so this too would further upset what fans were left because they would want to know what became of Jamie. They also decided the high tech virtual reality angle was dumb. It would cost a lot to show him in a virtual world deciphering runes and Celtic bullshit. So why not cut it down to Tommy is a book nerd and just does classical research the old fashioned way.

Speaking of doing things the old fashioned way. Scraping the idea of the long lost second daughter. We return to Jamie, whom we find in the film to be pregnant. Was this how the story always was once they brought her back? Yes. This began the second path of why did you do this. Because they had to decide on something important.

Each new version of the story had Jamie being kidnapped after the events of Part 5. She would be held by the cult, and once she was of, birthing age. She was impregnated.

At first, the father of her baby as we see delivered in the films opening. Was the cult leader himself Dr. Wynn, the Man in Black.

Thankfully, and shockingly. The studio felt that, having a much older man impregnate a young teenage girl was, for lack of a better term. Fucked up. Actually they described it(and this is important) They found it too taboo, too realistic, too depraved.

So obviously that had to be changed. So a new father would be named, as well as a better method that didn’t involve sex with a teenager.

They found the answer! Magic! They would use ritual magic to make Jamie pregnant. This time the father wouldn’t be the old man Dr. Wynn. Instead it’d be Michael! They don’t call in Wincest for nothing folks!

Yes, it was, and is directly implied. That Michael, Jamies uncle, through magic was the biological father.

Somehow, for. Reasons. That idea too was scraped. No idea why but, they felt it just seemed a little too. Well no shit they scraped it. So the next logical answer?

Enter the producers cut. This time around, Jamie will be made pregnant through ritual magic. But the father? The father would be the essence of the demons evil that resides within Michael.

Because sure why the fuck not. Michael the uncle knocked up his niece?! NO! he didn’t have sex with her you perv! They used magic! HOW IS THAT BETTER?! ITS STILL HER UNCLE!! No! No, no, no! You pervs. It’s not Michael himself. It’s the evil WITHIN Michael that got his niece knocked up!

Well this was too much. For everyone. Obviously, right? So they changed it. Again.

This is what they did for the Theatrical cut of the film. Because you can’t go around explaining ritual magic pregnancy involving the evil within her uncle as the father. Or the old Man in Black as the father. So the studio, in an understandable panic. Changed this yet again. They made it make logical sense. They tossed out the WHOLE IDEA! Fuck your ritual magic pregnancy! Instead they went with science bullshit that could be more believable.

In the theatrical cut, Jamie is with child through artificial Insemination. They even filmed a scene to support this, where Tommy would do a walk through a room of unformed horrors showcasing each attempted embryo. So who was the father this time? Who donated their nut butter to artificially inseminate Jamie?

Michael.

They took out the rune magic ritual. The essence of evil transfer, the old man, and Michael through magic impregnating Jamie…and decided to collect Michaels little swimmers, plant them in Jamies eggs, and introduce the egg back into Jamie.

This was just the beginning. People. You have to realize this. This was just the fucking script stage. It started off ripping itself off, course corrected by knocking up teenage Jamie, and instead of stepping away from that concept. They doubled down, then tripled down on it.

What could possibly go wrong from there once they settled on the script?

The casting debacle.

Danielle Harris, who I admittedly as a kid had a crush on, and even more admittedly still love today and think she’s done awesomely for herself. Paid a huge price for nothing in this film.

When it was announced Jamie would be returning for the film. Danielle fought to return to the franchise and reprise her role. At the time of filming she was 17 years old. It’d fit the character perfectly, unfortunately given the story. So why not use her? Firstly it was a problem with her age. Game of Thrones more famously brought this fact to life as did Harry Potter before it by telling the public, that when casting young actors in your films and television shows. They have to operate on different schedules because of child labor laws. They have to dedicate time to school, and you can’t have them working certain hours. The answer presented to Danielle by producers, Akkad, and the studio whom at the time was Dimension/Miramax? Legal emancipation.

The producers, studios, and Akkad pushed for her to file in court for legal emancipation. If a young adult under 18 files for legal emancipation, this means they legally are recognized as an independent adult. Meaning they no longer fell under strict child labor laws for schooling, locked in hours. She becomes a legal adult responsible for herself no longer needing support from her family.

Danielle cared enough about this franchise and her character. That she did it. She spent a large sum of money on lawyers, court filing fees, and she did it. She pushed and spent a large portion of her money from the past two films and was now a legal adult. She was ready to return as Jamie.

So why didn’t she? Did she realize her uncle would be getting her pregnant and she’d die in the film? No. Instead the studio stopped her.

The same studio that pushed her to seek emancipation, cut her out. She was ready to sign her contract as Jamie, she gave them her original contract pay of $5,000, and the studio said no. Instead they offered to pay her between $800 to $1,000 for her role.

The girl spent over four grand in fees, because the studio pushed her to free herself to work for them. Only to severely undercut her from the franchise. So she walked away. For someone to have that amount of love for a film franchise their character helped resurrect, to go through all that and with the insistence of both Akkad, the studio and everyone involved on the production level. Just to know you’d repay their loyalty with shit. Is pretty fucked up. They can’t even blame it on a tight smaller budget. This film would receive a $5 million dollar budget. It was just a matter of one department having no connection or care for Harris and her place in the franchise.

Surely that is enough as to why the film failed and what happened to it, right?

Oh if only.  We are just now getting into the next battle. The classic studio vs the producer vs the director.

In the early 90’s, Miramax and Dimension was carving a name for itself as a home for horror. They knew it would bring in cash and they embraced it. Much like Lions Gate when it became the home of horror and house of SAW. At this time they ended up purchasing the rights to Halloween and the franchise. Solidifying the casket that we will be scratching our way through after this film. While they bought the rights to the series, Akkad still maintained George Lucas like control, creatively over the franchise.

As always Moustafa had his original unchanged vision to stick too for this series and character. The tried and true slow burn atmospheric horror that worked in the first four(excluding three of course). Miramax however wanted more. They wanted bloodier, gorier, faster more intense kills. That’s what the kids of today wanted and craved. That’s what they’d get. So the two constantly were at odds with one another and Akkad would have to fight an uphill battle he wasn’t really used too. Had it been his own studio? No problem. But now he was in the position of being told what to do, moved down the line to finger waggling knowing he couldn’t threaten to pull out the franchise. He could only watch things happen and give his input for what should happen. Whether it would is a different story.

The film also carried on the odd tradition that plagued later Jason films as well. The director was not a fan of horror, and hated the franchise. He didn’t ask for the project, and didn’t want anything to do with it. He was given the film as part of a multi film contract he signed with the studio. He hated this to a point where it matched the trend set by this film from its script stages.

He hated everything to do with the cult of thorn. Good! Good on you sir, yes, to hell with the dumbass cult of leprechauns. It didn’t win anyone over in Season of the Witch, it wont work here!

He also hated the long winded speeches given to Dr. Loomis. Okay I…well if they’re good that works, his character is supposed to give speeches and unfurl the thing that is Michael for us. But. Okay I guess?

He hated the continuity and flashbacks of the film. Oh…okay, but it’s part of…a series you. You kind of need this.

He hated Akkad’s Carpenter style Halloween with a passion. Slow burn sucked, it has to be for modern kids who want fast kills no explanations, no speeches. Just kill, kill, kill! O-oh okay um. Well yay for the killing but, oh god make it stop.

He hated the music. He wanted grunge, Alternative rock, music of the new generation. Fuck Alan Howarth and fuck Carpenter.

Did I mention the man hated Donald Pleasance role entirely? He hated the character of Dr. Loomis? Because it cannot be understated. The man legitimately hated him and his role.

Old man slow. Old man not needed. Your ruining a movie I don’t even want to make and I’m trying to make it hip and cool!

It takes a special kind of director to actively both film a movie, and also hate his movie. But it takes an even more special person to begin actively butchering and destroying their own work.

But he did.

Before even the MPAA could get ahold of this film, and oh believe me when they did…But before that. The director, because Akkad represented everything he loathed with this film and the franchise. He chose to side with Miramax executives and when the studio handed him a scalpel telling him to slash away scenes and change the narrative. He said bitch please and pulled out a chainsaw. The man hacked away at his own film and became Michael Myers. He made cuts without emotion or thought. His eyes rolled over black and he just hacked and slashed and hacked away.

Atmospheric tension was replaced with music video style editing, cuts, loud music and rapid fire scenes. When it came time to focus his murderous rage from the film back to its ending, he focused solely on the cult of thorn. He cut out the entire cult ending and reshot a new, better ending. He tossed the ritual druid magical mystery tour, and turned the entire thing into a laboratory massacre. He added in the fetuses, the cloning idea, artificial insemination concept. All of it. Michael didn’t survive only to become the pet of Loomis. He gets a huge injection of green ooze straight from the sewers of New York, and Tommy beats the man to death with a lead pipe.

It doesn’t seem like much? But given you had two films building up all this new lore and the last one setting up the cult directly. It was a lot. But there was still more with the ending! Since he cut out the original ending and Michael no longer passes on to Loomis, You still had the footage of Loomis at the end telling Tommy and the group he has to return to the building for unfinished business. Loomis walks inside the building and instead of finding Michael on the floor where Tommy left him? He finds Michaels mask. Then we hear him screaming and the film just, ends.

Did Michael kill him? Did he scream because the nightmare will continue as Michael has again escaped as he often does? It’s up to the viewer.

Since the director killed the original ending this was all they had. There was no reshoots. Nothing they could do. Pleasance was done filming and unfortunately passed once the producers cut of the film was assembled.. They had no choice but to edit together from bits and pieces a new, rushed ending, recycling his scream from the original ending, and called it good.

Surely this is it before the film faces the inquisition?

Well you can’t have disaster without a natural disaster! The film ALSO was filmed of all times to film a Halloween film. In the dead of winter. Which fits oddly because the last movie was filmed during the summer and they had to ship in fall colored leaves. Winter filming is always fun because actors have to learn not to breath when acting so as not to exhale plumes into the air. It also means they have to dress for warm nights in the freezing fucking cold. In this case. It actually was quite literally freezing fucking cold. The filmed this in Salt Lake City. I have had the unfortunate and fortunate luck of having visited Salt Lake city as a kid. And I remember we did so in the winter season. I remember because our parents told me and my sister, repeatedly, and stressed to us. Pick out the thickest warmest coat you can find. Because it’s gonna be cold as balls. Having lived our lives in California we had no idea what cold was until we traveled through Salt Lake city, and Arizona.

The actors had to dress for warm weather on film, during sub zero night shoots. No one was happy for any of this. Being wrapped in blankets, then taken out and forced to act in the actual freezing outside no one would be caught dead without a coat is, insane but typical of Hollywood. However what wasn’t typical and added to the fun, was they got hit with an actual blizzard. Thanks to the blizzard sets were closed down, equipment froze and locations became unfilmable. Forcing more rewrites and setback the film largely on its schedule.

When even the hand of Cthulhu extends and tries telling you to stop this bullshit and walk away. You’d think they would listen. But no. They carried on.

The film, frost bitten, limping down the road, eyes frozen open and disjointed, an unrecognizable creature formed into a theatrical cut. Finally brought itself before the warm hearth of the MPAA.

Even after the rewrites. Reshoots, the director going ape shit gutting his own film. And the studio getting what they wanted, a gory bloody murder parade of Fuck you Moustafa. It now had to face the MPAA and the looked at the disjointed masking tape held together beast. Only to further cut at it and dismantle the film.

Because the studio pushed for a bloodier film for the modern audience. The MPAA absolutely was not going to let it fly. The film was threatened repeatedly with an NC-17 rating. Alienating the very audience they said they made the film for, blood lusting teens. The same audience the MPAA was vividly against and wanted gone. This was released in 1995. The end of the long standing war on horror was approaching. That didn’t mean the MPAA would show mercy. It was the opposite. Much like Sabaton told us in their song Resist and Bite, “When faced with retreat or death, a rare breed of soldiers choose a third option, they resist and bite.”

The war would end soon when Wes Craven brought SCREAM before them, and fought them with the idea the film was self aware parody and meta horror. Halloween The Curse of Michael Myers would not have this fight. It was facing the rabid jaws of a beast that had grown tired of the flesh it devoured from horror. Though horror was the bread and butter of Miramax/Dimension. Whom would come to release Scream later. It was no longer the power house it used to be, and did rather sub par in theaters. It was seen as what the MPAA and studios had devoured it into. A dead nearly dying ‘thing’. So absolutely the movie was eviscerated by a not yet done with it beast.

Michael Myers ripping out someone’s spinal cord? The hell you thinking son?! Cut it!!

Michael gutting a nurse, spilling out her guts? Y’all need Jesus! CUT IT!

You tossed Jamie into a corn thrasher? The fuck you did psychos! Cut that shit!

One of the funniest cuts though. For some reason the MPAA is offended greatly by sex, and head explosions. Read into that what you will. But in the film The Man in Black had his head taken off. Michael had enough of him and off went his head. The MPAA said no and cut it. The movie being done and no more shooting happening. This created a plot hole with the end of Dr. Wynn and what happened to him. Earlier when Michael goes after kara, he explodes her abusive step fathers head via electricity. It still works. I mean it’s not bad, bad. But it cuts away so quickly from his death you end up with a ‘who cares moving on’. Like Clark Griswald rushing his family from the Grand Canyon. He’s rushing his family back to the car, his wife ask if he even stopped to look, he turns, nods out at the grand canyon then rushes them off quick as can be to the car.

Its still pretty good effects work, but no head explosion.

Same goes for Kara’s mother. She gets an off screen death, where in the cut before had her shown receiving an axe gift from Michael.

With everything this film faced, I can easily see the studio presenting itself to the MPAA , falling on their knees and begging for mercy on behalf of the film.

I mean all of it. Everything was one brutality after the other. It was relentless, and now you had to bring it before a board known for hating horror. Giving them a film which was due to release in theaters and you had no time, no money, no energy for any kind of reshoots. This thing was going to be released as a snuff film. I keep hearing the line from the Simpsons, Stop hitting him he’s already dead.

But they still kept persisting.

And yet, they still had one final nail added to their coffin.

Even after all that. Everything. The film still had to show itself to the public.

Like any good freakshow. It had a fairly strong opening. People were excited to learn what happened to Jamie. They wanted to see, they wanted to know. Now they know.

This film continued the trend Jason and even Freddy eventually joined in on.

It made $15 million. At a cost of roughly $5 million. Critics, audiences, fans hated this film. Hated it. The movie was eviscerated by everyone and was panned across the board as a massive critical failure.

But…

It made just enough, to be considered profitable.

Quality does not matter to these people. As long as something can be made. There is still life in the old girl yet.

It’s comparable in a lot of ways to today, more specifically you could look at the modern western gaming market and games like Wolverine. The game cost hundreds of millions. It was torn apart by critics and fans. People openly mocked it and yet they still called it a success, again siting Thrawn in the Ahsoka show, there is victory even in defeat.

They never learn, and they never will.

Because still. Somehow. After the brutality that was The Passion of Michael Myers. They made even fucking more.

But hey, this time they had a better premise to sell it on! This would be their Jason Takes Manhattan of the franchise. Because this next entry in the dead Celtic corpse of Michael? Was bringing back Jamie Lee Curtis

Jesus fucking wept.

Part 8 Halloween H20

At some point, you have to ask yourself why. It happens in life, a lot more severely later on. More specifically once you hit your 30’s. But in this case it comes up more so with our hobbies and interest. My ex made herself read more. She’d go through a few books a week and she would generally go through themes. One of the last ones she did before our split was reading through classics of literature and books people generally considered required reading. One of these, I can’t recall the name. But she told me how it was causing pain mentally, trying to get through each page. The story was bad, the writing was unrelatable and she just didn’t dig it what so ever. Every word from her about it. Even asking her the following day how it went reading? Would elicit a deep sigh. I asked her why keep reading it then? If it’s that bad and you hate having to read it, why force yourself? Just find a better book. The answer usually, more times than not was simply “Well I started it I want to finish it, then I’ll get rid of it forever” It’s not even about hoping it will improve, or giving it a chance. It’s just about trying to finish it and getting the thing over with. I related in some respects with her. Because I’ve put myself through movies no one should watch. Let alone a second time. I watched things I absolutely hated myself for giving any time too, but I’d finish them. Because I started this journey, I’m gonna finish it, and then I can hate it with all my heart having finished it. To this day I have only ever turned one movie off after 20 minutes of it. The movie was that insanely bad and I didn’t want to even dignify it with a review, a mention or a fuck you. I just wiped it off my review list and found another because it was just that bad. But I still keep finding, as she kept finding. New things to make you stop what you are doing and doing to yourself to straight up break the inner narrative and ask, why am I doing this?

At some point. We all do that. To varying degrees of depth and internally review ourselves and our live choices.

In this case. It’s knowing. Not even guessing, but knowing that, as we all do this. And much more once we pass our 30’s. That you realize these filmmakers. Had to ask themselves the same thing. With every thing that happened on the last film. Everything that could fail and did fail. Even things that you didn’t imagine would fail. Failed. Why? Why make another one?

Dr. Loomis the torch bearer against Michael was gone, long may he reign. Jamie was dead, no one cared about the fucking cult of thorn or Michael. Not one soul gave a literal fuck about your titular character.

Fans didn’t even have that breakup period we get in, where you realize damn being alone sucks. You think about your ex, you miss ‘moments’, keyword. Moments with them. You think about possibly calling them up, seeing what they’re up too. Maybe it opens up a door, maybe you can try things again. But then you have to tell yourself no, and remind yourself why the breakup happened. No one was having this moment with Halloween and wanting to return to it.

The damage was so severe it damaged the brand. So again. Why? Why make another film? What could they possibly hope to achieve? Reviving the franchise a second time? To what end? You had that and didn’t just fumble the ball, you fucked it in the middle of the field and took a giant liquid shit all over it after.

But here we go. They made an eighth one of these goddamn things.

And under the same premise of Friday the 13th. The last one was an abysmal failure. But this time we will have Jamie Lee Curtist return as Laurie Strode!

Well kick the tires and light the fires that’s brilliant! She started this gangster shit she surely can breath life back into it! An older wiser Laurie forced to face her fears once more. But this time she’ll be ready! Michael against Laurie, let’s go!

That’s all it took. Jamie was in a position she wanted to return to the franchise that got her foot in the door. That itself was worth praising. Not many actors once they hit the big leagues like to remember their little starter films. Especially horror since it’s not looked on so favorably. Kevin Bacon, Johnny Depp, even Marisa Tomei did horror. She appeared in The Toxic Avenger. That I kind of get not wanting to tell people. But still. She loved what horror gave her, and kudos for wanting to go back into it.

Was her return enough to put asses in seats? Yes it was.

Did the film do well? Absolutely. Surprisingly? It was the highest grossing of all the Halloween films at that time.

This was given a serious budget for a change. We’re not talking $5 million or $8 million. This film was made for around $17 million, and it grossed $75 million.

It was a raging success and genuinely brought back the franchise from the death bed it was tossed onto and spit on. It was unheard of at the time and something that wouldn’t happen to any other Franchise. The closest you could compare is when we finally got Jason vs Freddy. But this film managed to do the impossible and given everything we learned the last film went through and did to itself? You absolutely can believe it was impossible.

Does that mean everything went perfectly?
Dear god fuck no.

This thing, much like those before it, and Freddy vs Jason went through a lot of changes. Trying to work with people hit by devastating loss and depression from the last outing was no easy task. But here we are. The movie did what would happen again later with the series. In a lot of eerie similar ways.

And unlike Jason Takes Manhattan this film delivered on its premise. We did indeed get Laurie vs Michael.

To which we should begin by quickly covering this beast

Story

This might sound familiar but. Right off the bat this film erases the previous sequels immediately. As far is this film is concerned, Return, Revenge, and Curse of Michael Myers never happened. The only canon films are the first and second films. 

The movie centers on Laurie many years after the incident with Michael that night and the explosion at the hospital. She has since then changed her name to Keri Tate. She is now the head mistress of a private boarding school. She has severe PTSD, still hallucinating and frightened by her estrange killer brother. To the rest of the world and her, Laurie Strode died in a car crash. Even though the other films were retconned completely, she does have a son, John. Because of her trauma she’s over protective and still believes Michael will find her, and kill her son.

Which absolutely he would do, if he knew about them. Which he learns thanks to finding the long time friend and colleague of the late Dr. Loomis, Marion. He uncovers from files Dr Loomis kept, the new identity of Laurie. Setting up his road trip across states to the secluded school. One by one Michael kills off a new batch of private school kiddos. Does Laurie begin telling everyone to run the fuck home, to get out? No. The film uses her PTSD and hallucinations nicely to cover this. She sees her brother everywhere. So actually seeing him at the school never hits her as being a reality.  On top of that? Even with people dying off, the campus was largely vacant for the time. Only some people stayed behind and it never occurred to her that someone, let alone Michael was going around killing anyone. Until a great moment in the movie where her panicked son and lady friend are fleeing from an unknown to them killer. Laurie’s boyfriend goes into protective mode and the group begin fleeing. Will ends up firing a gun off into the dark thinking it was the killer, only to find he struck the schools security guard. Laurie is in the middle of a panic attack trying to unravel things and in the middle of all this she sees Michael Lowering himself from the ceiling behind her boyfriend. Lifting him and killing him.  That’s when she realizes its not a hallucination-this shit is real and he’s actually there, hunting her and her son. Something years later that stuck with me from this film because it was just so well shot was a scene straight from Jurassic Park where Laurie secures a door and looks up through the glass portal to see her brother staring down at her and that moment of realization and acknowledgement. Just. Man it’s good. It’s made even better that when they BOTH have that look, they recognize one another. She pulls a pistol and looks for him to shoot him. But he’s gone. For her she STILL thought it was in her head until he reappeared later and kills Will. It’s just so good.

So Laurie manages to get her son and friend out the door to their car, time to escape. But Laurie tells them to go on, she’s got unfinished business.

It begins a great sequence where we see her transition from pray to hunter. This sequence leading into the final act of the film is worth watching alone. As the kids leave and Laurie locks the gates. She kicks the glass on an emergency fire axe. Grabs it and heads up to the school. All the while in the background you start hearing the slow build up of Carpenters Halloween theme and it peaks just as she screams out her brothers name.

Laurie faces off against Michael and as the two have their epic battle, eventually she proves the victor. Her son proves to his mother he isn’t a failure as a child and had the ability to get help and get the police out there. In horror this is nearly unheard of. The police always show up after everything is said and done if they do at all. So with Michael now dead and loaded up into the coroners van in a comfy body bag. The movie is ready to end. But Laurie says no, fuck that. I know this bitch. By this time Scream has come out and forever changed how horror has to operate to work for the audience. They know a final jump scare is likely coming. So Laurie gets ahead of the curb. She jumps into the drivers seat of the coroners ride and takes off full throttle. Just as she knew he would, Michael is back with life in his blood and hope in his heart. Rising up in his bag ready for round 2. Laurie is ready for this and slams the breaks sending her brother through the van, yeeting him out the windshield. She rams the van into her brother for a hug and stumbles in a daze out of the car. Axe still in hand to bid her brother farewell.

Now, this could be a not so subtle nod from the filmmakers. It could also be random. But given where this franchise came from up to this point, you gotta imagine they knew what they were doing. But Laurie confronts her brother Michael, who reaches out to her. She in turn reaches for his hand. Mirroring Jamie and Michael in part 4. Only this time Laurie doesn’t touch her brothers hand in a farewell. She says no, your ass is evil. You fucked up my holidays. She takes a swing and off comes his head. Leaving Laurie standing over her brother, finally dead and gone.

That itself is a great closure to the franchise. We know it’s not. But it really is a great way to ride off into the sunset. Jason got taken out by a fucking toxic waste wave and turned from the melting monster into a little boy. Michael got his fucking head taken clear off by the woman he tormented for over 20 years. I imagine my sister would take me out the same way for all the years she put up with me growing up destroying her barbies. I have no doubt if I ever turned zombie she’s take my head off the moment I had even a scratch on my hand.

So if it ended so well, and was an absolute success. Where did things go wrong, or did they even?

Oh there were, complications. We’ll say. Beginning as always and funnily(kind of) with the story.

Given the failure of the last film Miramax had no illusions of releasing another Halloween in theaters. They actually passed a direct-to-video script. That alone is a level of acceptance few will admit too. That script had the basis for what the film would eventually adapt. With a lot of changes. Thankfully.

Most notably is that this sequel would not have Michael in it. They were going to take this in the direction of Friday the 13th A new Beginning, with the fake Jason. This story had someone dressed up as Michael killing teens in a private school.

More specifically it was focused on an all girls school and one of the girls there was, SHOCKINGLY related to Michael. They really love that trope. The movie would copy Scream in creating a mystery among the girls. Who was the killer? Was it Angela who always left dishes in the sink? Was it Jemma who never flushed her turds? Was it old man Jenkins the grounds keeper?! Who knows.

Thankfully Jamie Lee got involved once the anniversary of the franchise was coming up and pitched to the studio returning as Laurie. Desperate for redemption and money. By redemption I mean money. The studio said fuck yes. Ditching the scream like mystery plot and throwing Laurie Strode back into the mix.

So naturally a rewrite was ordered up!

So they kept the private school murder romp idea, and decided interestingly. To not throw out the other films. They actually worked out keeping them canon, cult of thorn and all.

Laurie would be working at the school, dealing with the trauma and PTSD of her encounter with estranged brother and stinky butt Michael, while also dealing with the murder of her daughter Jamie. It’d even work in her daughters son, now cared for and adopted by Tommy Wallace and Kara. Ultimately everything after that stayed close to what we got with H20. She changes her identity, becomes a drunk dealing with trauma and eventually faces off with Michael. Only this time she wouldn’t behead her brother. Instead she’d let the lower class schools private helicopter slice him in half.

They liked the school idea. Jamie Lee pushed hard to keep the trauma in the script. But she hated the idea of the helicopter killing him. She wanted him dead by her hands. It was even in her contract she would get to kill him explicitly her. No one else.

On top of this, the studio decided to drop keeping the other films storyline because it would make it difficult to explain the whole Cult of Thorn, the man in black, What happened to Loomis if he was now the cult leader if they went by the producers cut, or if he died by Michaels hands at the end or old age got him. Pluss you had to explain why Laurie, a caring mother would abandon her daughter Jamie and change her name, faking her death. Leaving her kid in the town Michael always came back too. It made her a shitty parent so it was just easier to forget the whole thing and bring it all back to the first two films.

So it was decided. Laurie Strode the school headmistress would be the course. No kids but her son and no cult.

Then the conflicts began.

First there was the comical attempt at getting Carpenter back. The studio would never do it, and he’d absolutely want nothing to do with them had they approached him. Jamie did though. She approached John about doing the film, reuniting the old band and doing one last hoorah for the fans. He agreed. Surprising everyone given how things went between him, Hill and Akkad. Which over time grew into a resentful feud between the two. Much in the same vein as Lucas with Star Wars seeing what they did to his creation once Disney took over and he was on the outside looking in.

I have no idea what we would’ve gotten with Carpenter returning to direct and Jamie Lee starring. But the rest of the world would never find out. Carpenter agreed to direct but he came to the table with his own list of on set demands. More to the point he had the same moment Laurie and Loomis had. He came to meet with the studio and production heads under the “I’ve got some things to take care of” manner. He approached the studio and demanded 10 million dollars up front as his directing cost. It was absolutely not normal, nor sane. But he did that specifically because he felt stiffed by Akkad and the studio. Not necessarily Miramax, but as a whole with Halloween. As we said he and Debra Hill stepped away. Selling the rights to the franchise and Moustafa paid them off. He received residuals for the first three in the series. But over the years. Akkad became very wealthy. As did the studio. Between the franchise sequels and merchandise. Especially the merchandise. Carpenter sold out too early and felt shafted. He alleged both Akkad and the studio kept things from him, that they weren’t up front and completely honest with his pay outs and he was being shorted. So asking for $10 million felt justified to him. Not as a directors fee but more of an “We’re sorry we cut you out of the million dollar empire you created. Here’s our apology”. It was unfortunate, but also never going to happen. They laughed him out of the room, he shrugged and said farewell.

So Jamie was down a friend but still had hopes of delivering a great sequel. Again as always. What could go wrong after that!

After surviving a clash of the egos. That was only the opening round. The next fight would come in the form of the script. Jamie Lee hated the script. With a passion. She fought hard against it but received massive push back. Initially.

Jamie from the beginning wanted to do this and return to the character, because she wanted to show Laurie in a survivors light. She wanted to dive into her trauma and how she was dealing with it, and for her to find strength and rise up to tare down what kept her scared over the years. It’s ultimately what she got to do fully(again) in the later Green Halloween films. The problem with the script that got greenlit and they began filming, was that for a majority of the film, including up into the final act of the movie. Laurie was spending her time screaming, running, screaming, getting jump scared, screaming and hiding.

Which was the opposite of her plans!

So she began pushing back hard. The studio didn’t do much to help things until she took a lesson from Carpenter. Only unlike him, she actually had leverage in this situation. Even as they moved forward filming with this script. She would battle daily for rewrites but would receive none. Finally she told the studio this script is bullshit. The dialog is horrible and the teens are cookie cutter shit stacks with zero character. Either we change this or I’m walking.

They decided okay, lets see about some rewrites.

Which she did get. Funny enough she contacted the writer of Scream and asked them to fix this shit show of a script. Which put EVERYTHING on hold. The studio shut down for a week or so while a new script was pinned. One in which Laurie would be the survivor who finds her voice and isn’t a scared girl. She got what she wanted. But she also got more problems.

The script could not, and would not be finished in a week. So once again Halloween entered that familiar territory Jason also enjoyed. Shooting without a finished script. Of course that caused issues. Rewrites and reshoots happened on the daily. More fights would break out and she would have to fight what felt like everyone just to get this thing done and over with.

On top of this, was what became a near legendary fight. The battle of mega ego.

Like said earlier. Jamie wanted to kill Michael. She had it written in that she would be the one to do it. That Laurie would see him die by her own hands. She wanted to cut his head off. It’s funny but true. I love the idea of having that in a contract. It’s no different but far less funny that Vin Diesal and Dwayne Johson had it written in their contracts for the Fast and Furious films that neither of them would lose a fight in the films. Soon the rest of that cast mirrored the same. It’s comical but true. I hate it and everyone else does. While laughing at these people.

So what’s the problem bud? Well the problem lies with the same man Carpenter could not stand. Akkad.

Akkad had a stipulation in his contracts as well. Michael could never be killed.

Obviously this would create a small issue.

Initially Jamie signed on to do the film under the clause she would kill Michael. The studio smiled nodded and said okay no problem. No one bothered to tell her about Akkad and his strict Michael survives at the end policy. The two fought constantly over this and Jamie barked back at the studio as well. She felt mislead by them, only agreeing to whatever she wanted just to get her back in the movie and make money. Which isn’t wrong. She just made the mistake of thinking they were human and would make an honorable deal to make a film for the fans. They’re only in it for the money, and she learned that.

In an early draft of the script the ending was left incredibly vague. To the effect Michael was supposed to end up in a car being driven off a cliff. Something he’d easily escape. When she asked the producers what the deal was. That is when she learned Moustafa had a legally binding clause in the franchise rights stating his demands for Michael. Now with a script unfinished and an ending yet to be written. Jamie was fighting for the film full throttle and it went about how you’d expect. The studio played the parent not wanting to take sides. Letting the two kids fight it out. Akkad was never going to change his mind. For him, just like it was with Carpenter and Hill. He new Michael was marketable and he didn’t want to kill the cash cow. Michael was a still lucrative market for Akkad. Forgetting the fact the last film killed any interest in the character and franchise. Forgetting this whole project was going to be a direct to video who cares project.

The man just had that big of an ego. While the studio was ready to roll in the money they dreamed was coming with Jamie at the helm. Moustafa saw it as another Tuesday in Halloween town.

Jamie once again got to the point, not threatening this time but actually at her wits end. She was packing up and ready to walk away from the entire film, The studio would eat a huge loss and both goats butting heads would just walk away unphased and pissed at each other over what could have been.

 So once the two stormed off and the studio found neither would give an inch to the other. They stepped in. Did they make it right? Did they finally settle things?

Absolutely fucking not.

For the success the film was, it was all a farse. There was no way they could make one party happy and the other pissed. So they came up with the great deceit.

They told Jamie, okay. You win. We’re writing your ending. Laurie gets to kill Michael at the end. She gets to take his head, ending once and for all Michaels reign and silencing all the fans screaming Laurie didn’t get the job done. She would be the hero and give closure to her character.

 Meanwhile, they approached Akkad and told him about a separate ending. The laid out plans for a sequel to follow this one. Where Michael would survive, and Jamies beheading was just in her head. That Michael would survive and the one beheaded would be a paramedic. Giving life once again to Michael and Laurie would be out of the picture.

So both parties were happy. Jamie had no idea what the studio had done and planned. They just gave her something to make her happy and get the movie done. So the film got its ending. They managed to finish without any more fighting(that we know of) and the film was ready to be brought in front of the MPAA

Like we said before, the war on horror had reached its peak with the release of the last Halloween. But it would take the release of Scream and Wes Craven’s battles with them to end it. The film passed with flying colors.

I say again. The film passed with flying colors. On its very first submission no less.

The film was well edited, and shot by the director. Who for once didn’t hate horror or the franchise. No edits were needed which given everything that happened during these times. Is still surprising.

It was an age for horror where things felt like they were legitimately returning to a new dawn where they were no longer being punished for being what they were. Scream made horror mainstream again and that meant people accepted it once more. This was the one time I enjoyed being a teenager in High School because we had a slew of horror returning to theaters and I didn’t have to stumble on to new finds at the video store.

In the end the film did what Jason never could, but sorely wanted to. The studio made its money back ten fold. Jamie got her hero’s end and fans loved the movie. People were pleased the Cult of Thorn was tossed out and buried. People were glad they didn’t have more hidden siblings to deal with and even those who wished Jamie had returned or been mentioned. They still loved this movie. It’s rare to unite a fanbase that hurt by the ones keeping it going. But Jamie had her well fought victory. Had the studio had their way this easily could have veered off into forgettable slop. It would have made money with Jamie Lee in it regardless. But nothing like what it did in the end. Had she walked off because of Akkad though? Part of me almost wishes she had, just because it would have exposed him for what Carpenter saw and maybe the franchise could have been put to rest for a few years more until it was time for Michael to rise once more.

Instead the studio had a promise to deliver on Akkad, And he came to collect as soon as possible. Ladies and gentlemen It is time, prepare yourselves to hear me use my favorite word that belongs in the dictionary.

Dangertainment.

HALLOWEEN RESSURECTION

Sometimes dead is better. Is a good line that gets brought up with a lot of these horror franchises. Unless they lean into the terribleness. Which cuts down the number of people saying it, but by no means the number of people believing it. But man that cash cow. It was healthy, now it’s nearly blind, one eye is solid, it barely moves and you start to make more sense of Metallica’s song One.

This film, is a journey. For everyone. I remember when it came out my friends and I were. Well we laughed a lot. The film did have some actual fun moments. But overall this was just not that good, or wanted. Especially the last part. It’s all too familiar at this point but as we’ve said, and said again between this franchise and the last. Where can you go after the last? And why.

Well we already answered that with the compromise of egos in the last film. This film had to be made to appease Akkad for giving Jamie her heroes ending, he needed his franchise to continue thus, Michael must return.

And we also must retreat a lot of familiar ground-I mean a lot. A LOT of familiar ground. Because this wasn’t just a let’s make Moustafa happy. This was a realization film. People only now, after a list of failed filmed and two successes began to realize. Maybe Akkad should be open to change. Maybe he should let the series open up a little bit. Did he? Of course not. So lets delve into that because this film is a bit complicated as it, like the others, and with Jason. Wasn’t entirely a success, wasn’t a total failure. But did finally put an end to Michael for a good long while.  

The Story

It was a different time, the horror landscape was shifting and popular once again. So horror started following popular trends to stay hip with the cool kids. In this case they decided with Scream being a big banger of a franchise and people loving the humor and horror from those. We need to interject it here. We also need to tap into that new film everyone’s crazy about called The Blair Witch Project and use Found Footage in our movie.

And so, the amazingly coined Dangertainment was born. Fear it, and embrace the cringe.

Given the end of the last movie with Michael being dead, they could have skipped over that. But no. Akkad wanted more. He had a score to settle. We get an immediate retconning of the last act from H20, we see Laurie doing her beheading, but alas it wasn’t Michael. It was a paramedic, and she hallucinated Michael. So Laurie is locked up in an asylum for decapitating an innocent man. She’s pretending to be catatonic waiting for Michael whom she knows will come for her, as he often wants to do. She is preparing to fight him once more and gets her chance. Only Michael is victorious and she dies. Giving Michael a kiss, for. Some reason and wishing him good luck against Busta Rhymes.

Michael now happy with having finally ended his family bloodline decides it’s time to go home and retire. Only his home is full of cameras, teens, and Busta Rhymes.

His home has become the center of live online entertainment. Busta Rhymes and Tyra Banks have setup the ultimate Halloween night entertainment for those who wont be out drinking, partying and getting laid. The internet was a big new fangled thing back then so we all have to deal with it.

6 lucky students are all competing for Internet fame, clout, and a cash prize for having survived the night, and maybe solved some of Michaels troubled path along the way.

If anyone has ever watched Ghost Adventures you know this shit is boring. They did not know this back then. But they acknowledged the potential for boring shit. So Busta decides to spice things up by dressing up as Michael and jump scaring the kids in the house. All while the real Michael is stalking the house wondering who these kids are in his home and why they’re touching his fine China. As you can figure out by now, the kids all get killed off one by one. People watching from parties are getting more into it because in our heart of hearts we love snuff films and no one is getting laid so, why not. The live audience is a fun part of the movie I’ll grant them that. Because you have two kids texting each other through these events, her friend texting what’s happening on the other camera letting her and the others know where Michael is. It’s a good trick and kind of wish more films utilized that kind of thing. But its short lived ultimately when the feed goes south.

Eventually Busta Rhymes is upset with Michael for ruining his Dangertainment project and confronts him. Michael takes the constructive criticism and throws him. Don’t worry Busta will return. As we get down to our final kids escaping Michael. Busta returns and decided to fight Michael. With his impromptu kung fu. Which is just as bad today as it was in theaters back then.

Michael escapes the cringe karate only to land himself in the control room of the house, wrapped in wires and sadly electrocuted. To death. Or at least shocked and charred on fire and put to sleep. Because as the coroners take him away, they decide to check on the body only for his eyes to open and roll the credits.

We had to get through that story because it really isn’t that memorable aside what you can laugh at. I will again though give it some credit in that at the time it was funny both in its cringe and some entertainment. But overall it was forgettable horror slop. Which today would mean shit, but back then it was less that the film was terrible, and more that it was just a see it and forget it, move on to the next one. There was a lot of that back then.

So what went wrong here, isn’t that hard to see. What the hell happened, just as much though not as biblical in proportions compared to the producer’s cut and H20.

First there was the script and the fighting. Which went hand in hand in that all too familiar way.

Given how many of these things we’ve had to endure so far, and the on again off again success. The executives wanted to protect their surprise investment. Again when Miramax picked up the franchise it wasn’t exactly at its high point, they watched it whither and what should have, in their minds printed money for them, was in fact dwindling. So when H20 blew away every other box office the series ever had. They stepped up and decided it now should be handled with a bit more respect. Like discovering a rare TCG card, you want to take care of it and not just let it sit out in the sunlight. This meant taking a bit more care and caution with the next film.

So they pitched a careful sequel. And hoped Akkad wouldn’t notice one of their subtle changes to the story. They wanted to make an anthology series. That sounds familiar…and they wanted to do it without Michael. Boy that…also sounds a little familiar. Their reasoning was less in line with Carpenter’s pitched idea of an anthology series with Halloween, and more about not risking upsetting fans(and Jamie) with undoing the end of their lone blockbuster sequel.

Moustafa immediately reminded them of the deal signed in blood they made with him after Jamie’s ending, and his contract keeping Michael from perma-death. So they would have to alter their plans to keep the dragon at bay.

So then came the idea of making Laurie’s son from the last film the star. Leave his mom alone and have her son obsessed with Michael. Realizing he survived somehow and now must hunt him down. Introducing a Tommy Jarvis like character to Halloween and moving from the time tested final girl formula the series and others after it followed. One of the oddest attempted stories, which still would have been kind of bizarrely interesting to have seen, focused on the security guard from the last film played again my LL Cool J.

Neither of these were getting a passing grade.

So just for fun they even circled back and decided, gosh you know what? Even though the last movie, we tossed out the other sequels. What if. Hear me out. What if we brought back Danielle Harris as Jamie Lloyd and had her-

 Moustafa screamed out a mighty roar silencing the room. The old timeline was dead and gone. A new one was here and this was the clean palette future films would come from.

So the past would be buried and the future would be the place to be. Which brought us the internet, the information super highway. As I said with Blair Witch being the big horror film of the time, the idea to bring found footage was an easy one. Funnily enough the idea pitched was Michael Myers meets Big Brother. Akkad was in love and the movie moved forward.

That just left Akkad to ponder, how do we kill Laurie.

Why not move on from her? It’d be easy enough and the past films did manage. But no. Some body, not naming names. But. Some. Body. Had to completely undo the last film, and make sure they undid some serious wrong doings.

So in one draft of the script Laurie Strode killed herself after the guilt of fucking up killing Michael and instead killing an innocent man. There was the option to leave her in a sanitarium going mad seeing Michael return and head off to Haddonfield. But no. She had to die.

But how can you achieve this. When it would mean absolutely admitting to the actress who made you a blockbuster and returned, was given her ending. That you lied to her. Why then would she agree to be in your movie. Just to undo her ending?

For the same reason as their feud began in the last film.

Contracts.

Jamie had signed a two picture deal with Miramax and was contractually obligated to do one more film with them. They decided to pull that card and make this next Halloween movie. That film. Her choice was either honor the contract, or go to court and fight it.

Having no choice in the matter she returned, but with her own stipulation. Seeing how they wanted to handle Laurie’s death in the movie. She told them to have Michael kill her himself. Have her make another final stand and he overpowers her. Let her go out fighting, not crying. And let it happen in the first 10 minutes. Her wish was granted and her obligation to the franchise she helped spawn and returned too and helped revive, was done.

Akkad was happy and Michael could move on without any possible road blocks or issues.

Part 1 The studio knows best

While Moustafa claimed the title of protective godfather over the franchise, in reality he was more like Elvis’s corrupt manager the Colonel. He liked money, and he knew to protect his cash cow. The Weinstein brothers, knew this franchise was a piggy bank they could shake and make rain. So they wanted, as they had in the past sequels to make a different movie that would give them more of everything. Just like what happened with Revenge of Michael Myers. They wanted more blood, more death, more intense.

They also didn’t care for the found footage gimmick. Mostly because it wouldn’t allow for good gore. It can produce scares for sure. But from what they saw during filming and what the director presented. They weren’t impressed. The actors were allowed handheld cameras and this was the footage they used. The result as you’d imagine. Was less than stellar and they were on the verge of removing the concept entirely.

They demanded reshoots. Make it bloody, make it intense. Bring in more lights it’s too dark. It looks cheap make it look better. This began to annoy the director.

See the director really liked the idea of the movie taking place on a streamed web site relying solely on hand cam and helmet cameras. But that also means a good deal of shaky cam which some people were still not thrilled with and made what you were looking at hard to make out if not done right. He had visions of a horror film shot similarly to Cannibal Holocaust where a large portion would be webcam like recordings and a minimal amount would be filmed traditionally. The Weinstein’s hated that and fought hard to remove it. But that would mean dropping the dangertainment angle and that wasn’t happening. Not at this stage. So reshoots were a regular happening. If it was shaky and realistically lit? Redo it and give it studio lighting. Slow it down. See the scary and then add the kill.

So with that done and things looking smoother, more to the studio’s liking. The next target for them was the ending. They hated it. A lot. Loathed almost. They let the director know this and took their wrath out on him and the writer. At one point they decided the best thing to do. Because they had the money and time(they didn’t)They felt the best option was too film four different endings, and see which one they like most. The director stared at them unsure if they were fucking with him or not. They were not. He said fuck it, why not. It’s your dime.

That’s actually not true, it would have been smart in any other case. But the Weinsteins legitimately had begun pissing off the director and pushing him to his edge. So much so to the point that when they proposed he film 4 different endings, he said later on that he joked to them “Sure lets do four endings. Then you can release the films with different endings in each theater!” The Weinsteins thought he was being serious and chewed him out. Adding more fuel on top of a propane tank aready ballooning from the flames dancing around it.

Part 2 Actors at war.

This film, like a couple other fun horror films of the time, would feature future stars. One of whom in this was already well known, Tyra Banks. Tyra was already well known, but she still decided to do this movie. Why? Because apparently her agent told her it would act as a bridge getting her parts in bigger more serious films, and away from things like staring along side Lindsay Lohan. So she figured why not let’s do it. She played beside Busta Rhymes and served as part of his Dangertainment team. Now she wasn’t given a full fledged character arch or for that matter a BIG character. But she like others would get a big fun death scene. Which is why most like doing these films. It’s the looking forward to how they’re going to end your character. After Busta Rhymes confronts Michael he tells him to go help Tyra with things in the garage. Which Michael does. He strangled her from behind and Tyra’s character gets their big death.  The director loved it, she enjoyed it. Everyone was happy. Except the Weinsteins. They cut it out.

Was it too bloody? Afraid the MPAA might say something? Did she upset them? No. They thought it would make for a scarier movie and scene if they cut out the filmed death scene and instead had her body pop up at the end as part of the usual discover the trail of bodies moment.

Tyra was not happy. She made it very openly known to those with recording equipment and free time, that she was snubbed. She didn’t get the career push she was promised. She wasn’t going to be remembered in Horrors hallowed halls. She was just there and forgotten. She also noted a lot of her scenes she filmed, had been reduced. So she barely even appears in the thing and further upset her. Which fell on her fans as well who expected to see their idol get killed off and have fun in a horror film.

Then we have the rising star

Katee Sackhoff.

This was her first feature role. It also served as a lesson for her later on with films, and especially contracts.

Those familiar with the movie would remember that her character teases making content worth logging in for, and that means flashing the camera. Which her character does. Giving the audience and you todays viewers what we back in the day had to rely on for our porn. Webcam titties.

I am almost upset that none of you out there will ever know the struggle we all faced. When looking at a single pornographic image online, on an adult web site, would take 20 seconds to fully load on your screen. Every. Image.

But I digress.

So yes, Katee would have to flip her top and show the world her bra covered breast. Katee was not aware of this fact, and felt uncomfortable doing it. Saying this now, makes sense, but at the time it wasn’t so well known but…When she announced her uncomfortableness with filming this. The Weinsteins stepped in and pushed for her to do the scene, claiming it wasn’t a big deal. Just get it over with. She pushed back and said no, she wasn’t about to show even bra covered breast let alone her tummy too. So the Weinsteins, teamed up with the director. BOTH of them pressured her to do the scene and move on with the film.

But Katee politely told them to fuck themselves. The Sweater puppies would stay cozy, warm and not for the eyes of the public. She packed her shit and waved everyone off.

The studio, familiar with these happenings, and Jamie Lee’s near walk off at not getting her way. They decided to do what Hollywood does. They told Katee alright, you win. No boobie shot. Your right, we’re wrong. Keep your top on and lets move on. Katee kept her dignity and bra her own business and the film continued.

However…

The studio, unbeknownst to Katee. Hired a body double and filmed the scene anyway.

She had no idea this happened, until she saw the premiere. Saying she was upset, and feeling a bit violated and lied too. Is putting it mildly. The fact the studio wouldn’t respect her, her body, and her boundaries, that they went around her and found a way to still get what they wanted. While now putting her in a position of applying for roles now having to defend the partially nude scene as not being her. It taught her some lessons on dealing with film contracts and looking for loopholes like that. She began introducing into her future contracts the No nudity and no deception clauses. This became something rather famously done and good on her. It was a fairly not uncommon practice in Hollywood going back further than most horror. Lloyd Kaufman wrote about it as well in his first book “Everything I learned about Filmmaking I learned from the Toxic Avenger”, where he talked about directors having to film any and all nudity first before anything else. Because even if the actress agrees to it? The longer you wait the more likely they are to change their mind. So you film the tits first before they get the chance to negotiate and rethink their decision.

And people think the porn industry is bad.

It’s actually worse. Really. Both are bad.

And lastly. Because the man demands center stage, we arrive at the inevitable

Part 3 The Rhymes are busted

Busta Rhymes.

At this point people should realize that Tropic Thunder was a movie about truth and a warning of what actors and filmmakers really are like.

The director wanted this to be a serious horror film. Keeping in line with the last Halloween, though scream had levity, it still had intense scares and tension throughout, topped off with kills that felt visceral and real.

That wasn’t going to happen.

Busta Rhymes had star power and the youth behind him. Bringing him in was the equivalent of Vin Diesel hiring overseas stars to make sure the box office would pay for another private jet to yet another island. That was their hope.

But hiring a big name as your draw for the film, also means hiring their ego. And this man had an ego.

To be fair though, Actors do have these, musicians as well. Some however. More than others. Kanye comes to mind immediately. Busta was no different, and whether for bragging rights, to protect his street cred, or because he simply is how Busta be. He didn’t just arrive on set. He took over the fucking production.

His character of Freddie Harris was meant to be a greedy promoter and the usual “The beaches stay open!” type character. That wasn’t going to work.

He wanted his character made more prominent. He wasn’t going to be a background forgotten character. He was going to be bigger then that. So he began demanding script rewrites. A new character for himself in a bigger role. He also wanted to fight Michael Myers.

The director fought back on these changes. Things were set and the film was going to go as planned. Busta fought back harder. When scenes weren’t changed. He began ad-libbing lines. Not just here and there.

The man tossed out all his lines and began making up his own. Every scene.

Then came the circling back to his demands for fighting Michael.

He flat out told them, and anyone within ear shot. He wasn’t going out like a punk. Michael wasn’t going to kill him. If P Diddy could turn his back on Godzilla in his music video and look cool for it. Busta could fight the man famous for killing everyone, and walk away unscathed. Leading him to the greatest decision for this film.

Busta Rhymes would fight Michael using his Dolemite style Kung Fu.

The director, the stunt coordinators. Everyone. Calmly pushed for what they felt made sense and would add weight to the scene and struggle. A grounded fight with grappling and strangling.

Busta bust out his kung fu and said fuck you.

He wanted everything. Wire fighting, spinning kicks, chops and everything the Wu-Tang would use in their kung fu console game.

The director, already pushed to his limit with the studio, and producers. Went to them looking for help. Anything to reel in Busta and his constant demands, script changes, dialogue changes, and now newly planned finale kung fu fight.

The studio told the man to shut up.

Busta Rhymes was a huge talent back then(2001) he made some fun videos and songs. So having him as the big name, meant let the man cook. When test screenings had people laughing at his dialogue? That meant let the man cook.

So the director was gagged and Busta would have his way.

So the fight was filmed. Kung fu and all. Busta got his wish, and he also was not killed by Michael. During the fight Michael would get the upper hand on the kung fu warrior, and would end up choking him out. But not killing him.

When they showed this ending in the initial cut of the film. Busta was pissed. He felt his character looked weak. He got choked out like a bitch and didn’t get a hero moment.

The man got the rarest of opportunities.

EDIT

The man gave himself the rarest of opportunities. Sorry is that better Busta?

He got to be one of the very rare few to stand up to Michael and go toe-to-toe. And live. But no. it wasn’t enough. The man demanded respect on his characters name. So the scene was cut out and reshot. The Weinsteins sang praises on the rap artist and he along with his entourage were at long last happy.

The movie started as a serious atmospheric horror, and he turned it into a wacky rollercoaster in every scene until it infected the ending.

Do I think that ruined the film? No, it was funny and really added a what the fuck am I even watching. Because it wasn’t a character. You were watching Busta Rhymes play as himself. He self-injected into the film and forced everyone to go along with it. Making his fans happy. But everyone else question, what the hell happened here?

With this film coming out in the 2000’s that meant the MPAA wasn’t as strict, and it passed as H20 did on its first pass through their grinder remaining intact.

This also was in part thanks again to the odd split personality of the studio.

When a studio demands more kills, more gore and death. You expect they know what they’re making and doing. But then those same studio heads who asked for this, being the ones to immediately cut it all out before submitting the film before the MPAA. It begs the question why? I mean why waste the makeup artist time and effort, why waste the film and cost of filming. Why do any of that, if you intend on cutting it? This wasn’t really the age yet of films releasing their uncut versions. Though that was very much well on its way. It was just an odd practice. Like being in bed with your lover and getting hot and heavy with your dirty talk. Promising to shake the paint off the walls and pounding them sore. Promising to do things even the devil would cringe at. Only to nut after 9 minutes and kiss their cheek before going to sleep.

It just didn’t make sense, but it’s what they did.

All of these factors, which through the series and related franchises. Ultimately added up to why the film didn’t do well. Again the success in every failure is that the movie did make a profit, but nowhere near the last one by any stretch of the imagination. It was made for roughly $15 million and made around $37 million. Not a great profit but not really a loss.

However it was everything that happened behind the scenes leaking its way onto the film that ended up damaging the brand to the point all interest died down.

Firstly the movie wasn’t scary. With the odd tonal shift going from serious to silly, and then Busta Rhymes on top of it. It confused audiences thinking they’d get a traditional Halloween. Instead they got a scream-esq film minus the scares and tension. Michael works as a shadow menace. Someone always looming nearby and always about to strike. Being unstoppable and knowing you were dead the moment he popped up. It did add some scares, but this film lacked it. Completely.

On top of this you had people experiencing what the youth today calls ‘the cringe’. Seeing Michael the unstoppable bullet sponge getting karate kicked through a window. Having a rapper slap him around like a bitch, spouting famously bad lines the studio said let him use like, “Michael Myers is a killer shark in baggy ass overalls who gets his kicks off of killing everything and everyone he comes across” and my personal favorite, “You want some of this? You want to try and kill me? Do you like sushi motherfucker?!”

I mean. That’s just me, but we have to give honorable mention to his words as Michaels body burns. “Lookin a lil crispy over there, Mikey, like a fried chicken motherfucker”

It’s pure poetry. I mean how did we suffer through boring ass dialog for so long in this series? Especially his break down of Michael as a killer shark in baggy ass overalls? It’s a lot more weighted and apt a description of Michael, over something from Dr Loomis, “I spent eight years trying to reach him, and then another seven trying to keep him locked up. Because I realized that what was living behind that boys eyes was purely and simply, evil”

Miramax knew what they were doing.

And fans agreed. Fans did not care for any of this. They didn’t like the dialog. They didn’t like the reality web show idea, which very quickly dated the film. The kung fu, the disrespect to their character.

I mean for the same people to look at Jason, Fighting a Boxer. Getting punched and pushed toward the edge of a building. The entire fight wasn’t full of quips. It was a fight for survival and fans grinned watching because they knew this guy had no chance and was going to fall. Hard. But the man made a hell of a final stand and they respected it.

He didn’t knock Jason off the building decapitating him and ending the film saying “TKO, bitch”

Though that would’ve made the scene funny. People just didn’t care for it.

And on top of all this? The biggest crime among audiences. Surprisingly. Was the betrayel of H20’s ending and Lauries victory.

Imagine that?

Everyone was happy with Laurie having defeated Michael Myers and getting peace in her life.

Then egos had to kill her off and undo Michaels final finale.

People had enough and they didn’t like having their closure rewritten for them. Michael was coming off as an old trope now in a genre he helped create and all the good hope and favor, all the trust built to bring him back for one last go round proved for not. It’s like the point you reach with Wrestling where you enjoy rivalry’s between two figures. Kane and Xpac started as an unlikely duo no one saw working let alone their friendship. Then the two were pitted against each other and fans ate it up. Until it repeated, and repeated, and eventually you had to ask yourself is the same shit really worth the price of another PPV?

A studio out to shake whatever they could from a freshly revived cash cow, being gatekept by another equally greedy man carrying a grudge against an actress for trying to kill his cash flow. A director battling everyone around him to make a horror film and an actor making himself the star of the picture. Again I say it. Tropic Thunder was a documentary, filmed in real time.

Having gone through two of these franchises, and sharing everything I’d known from documentaries over the years as a fan and research now. It’s incredibly interesting but also just baffling when you look into everything these movies went through. I mean at its core? The idea is simple. You release a film that does surprisingly well. You decide to build on that film with a sequel. Like Scream pointed out to us. You up everything the next go around, you get more lore you change the rules up from the last film. It’s a formula these franchises coined and worked well off of. But inevitably they lose their way down the line.

It’s easy to call a film bad and never look past just the experience alone. But when you start looking at these factors. Researching the movies and learning what hell they went through, not only does it add up, and give you points to throw out there as to why the movie sucks. But it should also make you wonder, who the hell even wanted this movie made if they worked that hard to destroy it?! Knowing Carpenter was yelled at by Akkad for wanting to turn the series into an anthology without Michael, Only for the studios to suggest the same, seeing the potential for a new route there. But the gatekeeper keeping you from his golden cow. Having people show actual want to do something with care to carry the series over and keep the momentum going, only to be shot down with the idea keep it how it first was. While retaining NONE of that on screen. It’s baffling. These people want to continue the franchise and agree on doing it. But then you hire directors and producers who HATE the franchise, who HATE the genre. How is that going to give you the product you wanted and how is that going to please the fans? Learning this film was given a regal pass of sorts with the MPAA and didn’t face nearly the trials and tribulations Jason did. That should have given Halloween the edge. But every other driving force behind it managed to take the wheel and somehow find a new tree to crash into.

Eventually both franchises would be revived in complete reboots. But we never get continuation. The only exception was years later, after the Rob Zombie music video Michael Myers, and the formula repeated itself once more. A film was made with respect to the original. The blessing of the director and the music done by him and his son. Laurie Strode returns again to repeat her H20 storyline with a much harder Laurie in this one. Ending on a strong note that brought balance to the force and the franchise. Only to decide. This needs to be a trilogy. And fucking up every single thing you should have just walked away from.

History repeats itself and they haven’t yet learned. With all the challenges Michael faced and survived. In the end after all these films, not including Zombies two films. If we had to put a pin on what the hell happened? This one feels more like it falls at the feet of Greed. The studios played their parts. The directors had their thumbs up there as well to the knuckle. The MPAA washed their hands of things largely. But in the end everyone was about the money. Moustafa held on to the franchise because he saw the money printing machine it could bring. Miramax bought it up for the same reason, to make money off an already established franchise, adding it to the Scream wheelhouse.

I almost wish it had been the result of studios overstepping and the MPAA. Because simple greed is just boring. But unfortunately makes sense.

I still believe, like Jason. These movies are rewatchable, and you can still marathon them. I don’t do the “Okay lets watch the first two, then part 4, then jump to H20 then go to the last Halloween trilogy because the rest suck dick”. I jump around, I watched all of these in order, and I still like suffering through the producers cut. Going back and forth between it and the theatrical. Same as I do with preferring the TV cut of Halloween 2. There’s stuff to like, but overall at the end of the day. You know your attention will drift, you won’t mind passing out through one or two of them. And you’ll still end up debating which ones were genuinely good and which ones sucked ass. But at least now with going through this. Maybe it can add on to that and give something to consider while you go through another watch party.

For now lets pray Michael remains buried and away from the worldwideweb. Even though it would be amazing to have a resurgence of Dangertainment.

Fucking Dangertainment, man.

Until next time, enjoy sleep while you can. Because next week might just be a nightmare.